Day 1 to MILF-dom........FAIL!

Okay. I got up feeling motivated in my new quest to be a MILF. I brushed my hair (rare these days) and actually put in my contacts and did my make-up.

Yesterday while I was at work me and a bunch of the girls were talking about my quest and I told them I would wear make up tomorrow and make myself beautiful! "Yippeee" everyone cheers!

So, I come in this morning feeling pretty darn good about myself! That was shattered quickly when one of the girls that I was talking to yesterday saw me and said "Erin, where's your makeup"?

What the mother f$%*$ing heck man??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I paused and nearly cried. Do I need more? I don't want to look like a flipping hooker for goodness sakes?!!

So I got closer to her and she said "Oh yeah I can see it now, its subtle".....

Ugh this just sucks. I don't want subtle. I want HOT MAMMA!!!

So, instead of working I am sitting here plotting my next make up move.

I used to love makeup. Seriously, I started wearing it when I was in the 5th grade. I remember my teacher ( I hated her by the way) Mrs. Seragar saying to me every single day when I came in to class with my blue eye shadow, blue eye liner, blue mascara (see a trend yet) bright pink lipstick and bright pink cheeks Mssssssss (yes very drawn out) Erin, pleeeeese go to the bathroom and wash that nonsense of your face. And every day I would go to the bathroom and wash it off.

Now why for starters my mom ever let me go to school looking like a hooker is beyond me but why in goodness name did I waste a hour getting ready for school just to have to wash it off everyday anyway?

I remember going to camp (sleep over) as a teenager with my caboodle (oh geez, am I dating myself) and it being filled to the top with tons and tons and tons of make up. Every girl would come to me and I would do makeovers. It was great. I LOVED makeup.

So why can't I love it now? Why can't I figure it out? Its killing me!

Okay enough dwelling on my epic failure. I am going to buy more make up today. Maybe I need a different eye color or something? Or lip gloss color? Errr.

Tomorrow I will triumph!